Can I be honest for the length of time it’ll take you to read this article?
Not that I tell lies, but I’m very private as and when it comes to certain things. I only talk about things I deal with in secrecy if it can help another person or if I’ve reached a point where I need someone else’s help.
Well, since I’m out of the “storm,” and what I’ve learned has changed me tremendously, I can talk about it and share the life changing lessons.
Last month was a September from hell. Every plan that I thought was secure suddenly went south. When I say every plan, I mean every single one. Work. School. Home. Spirit. Love. All of them. Hell, I didn’t even feel good about my future…which was a first for me.
I felt like there was a dark cloud hovering over me every day. I was miserable. I knew that I had to make a change or I could risk my sanity, my health and my happiness. But after I did the very thing I didn’t want to do, things got better. Instantly. And they weren’t just better, I
felt feel better than I’ve felt in months.
Here’s what I learned from that experience:
You gotta do it for you.
Coming to terms with some of the decisions I’d made was tough, but not because I wasn’t sure of them. It was tough because I worried about how other people would feel about them and what conclusions they would draw. You aren’t responsible for how someone feels – that’s their business. So whatever you decide to do, make sure you’re doing it for yourself. You only have one you.
Learn to let go.
I’m a fighter. I fight for the things I believe in and the people I love, sometimes at my own expense. Things were so bad for me that I did something that I’ve never been good at doing – I let go. I let go of people, possessions and dreams that were not in my best interest. Even now I’m surprised that I haven’t backtracked because that’s just how much of a failure I’ve been in the past about letting things go LOL. I haven’t looked back and I don’t have the slightest desire to. I seriously cannot believe it! It just goes to show that I didn’t lose anything (that’s what had kept me holding on, thinking I was losing something) and those things and those people aren’t part of what’s next for me.
Embrace the unknown.
The thought of letting go of everything I’d been holding on to was scary. I’m a planner and I like for things to go a certain way and that’s not how life works. I totally get it now! I’m going into this next chapter of my life with total openness for what’s to come. I’m in a great place mentally, I have a rekindled fire for my career aspirations, I get to enjoy a budding romance that’s been years in the making and I’m surrounded by people who love me and really have my back…not conditional people whose love and loyalty depended on what I was doing for them. It doesn’t get any better than this! Why try to plan the course? It’s already working itself out and the unknown isn’t scary anymore, it’s exciting and I’m expecting (and preparing for) the best.
I shared all of that to say this: you can never lose.
If you believe in God then you have to believe that everything that happens to us has a purpose and that purpose is to make us better. The hurt, the heartache, the difficulty…it all makes us stronger and puts us in a position to help someone else when they go through the same situation. I’m a living example of that.
No one is promised to have an easy, comfortable life so why do we go through life like we’re above struggling or hard times?
Be open to whatever is going on and just get through it. If you feel like there’s a cloud over you…keep going…there’s a rainbow on the other side of your situation. I know from experience.