The Jessica Diaries

The Jessica Diaries: I Won’t Let Him Love Me


From The Jessica Diaries

One of the tasks on my current 100 In a Year list is to read at least twelve books. I’m happy to say that I’m more than halfway done with the task, but I’m even happier about the books I’ve been able to read. The most recent one I’ve finished is by Britni Danielle and the title of it is Two Steps Back. It’s a follow-up to one of her previous titles and it’s a great read if you’re looking for something quick and entertaining.

Anyway, I really liked the main character (Jaylah) in the first book of the series but in Two Steps Back she began to irritate the heck out of me. Without giving away any spoilers, Jaylah was seeing a man who made her his entire world. He did everything in his power to prove to her that she was important to him and although she had reasons to not trust him, he tried really hard to fix it. Instead of giving him the benefit of the doubt in some situations, she always felt a need to follow up on things he’d told her. She would bring up his past during the most inappropriate times and she was very difficult to please. It was like she was trying to find all these reasons not to give him a chance.

After I finished the book, I was talking to someone about it and I thought that maybe I began to dislike Jaylah because I saw some of my personal flaws in her. Although I’m nowhere near as bad as she was and my situation is totally different, I’m similar to her in one way: lately it has become very hard for me to give guys a fair chance.

I’m at a point in my life where I’ve managed to successfully minimize my distractions. In other words, I’m very focused and I have a life outside of my business and career goals. I’ve created a balance that’s working for me.

One major distraction in my life has always been relationships. Once I’m in, I’m all in – it’s the only way I know how to love. By definition I’m single, but I do date. I don’t mind giving guys my phone number if I’m attracted to them or to something about them and let’s just say I have a lot of suitors. There have been times as and when I’ve had two or three dates lined up in one week or I’ve been on multiple dates with one guy for a period of time and I even have vacations on the table.

Continue reading on my personal blog by clicking here.

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