I’m probably messing myself up here, but I’m gonna take one for the team and let you in on a little secret: If you want the upper hand in a relationship, make sure that you aren’t in to that person more than they are in to you. The moment that you are, you lose your power.
See, J. Cole didn’t make “Power Trip” just because he thought Miguel’s vocals on his first single would get more people to buy his album. He made that song because maintaining a relationship and keeping that person interested in you is nothing but a balancing act between the two people involved. Let’s be real here – in most cases someone is always going to have more power than the other. And I don’t know about you, but I don’t wanna be the one up all night singing love songs while the person I’m falling in love with is pillow talking with someone else.
It all goes back to the Principle of Least Interest. This theory (yes, it’s an actual theory) simply states that the person who is least interested in continuing the relationship has the greatest power. Why? Because as and when one person is more emotionally involved than the other, they risk having their emotions taken advantage of.
Although it shouldn’t be this way, the reality of a lot of relationships is that both people hardly ever have the same amount of emotion, feeling, desire, etc. invested. As a college student, I saw it all the time. I’m sure you have a few examples of this theory too, now that you think about it. In fact, most of us have probably experienced this. But it doesn’t just apply to romantic relationships, it’s also applicable to business relationships. When a person is too eager to agree to something or go along with a plan or price they can be easily manipulated.
This whole least principle thingy sounds so harsh, but it doesn’t mean you stop loving someone or showing interest in them. You just have to be smart enough to not allow yourself to be taken advantage of by someone who doesn’t share mutual feelings or at least show you that they’re interested in you too and when you think about it, what’s so wrong about that?
Have you experienced this? How did it work out?