Hey, it’s me. Jessica. The woman who used to blog every week. I know I’ve been M.I.A. Have you missed me?
That’s ironic, because I’ve missed me too…
Ok, enough with the dramatic intro. It’s painfully obvious that I haven’t been “myself” for the past several weeks. I’ve only posted about three times on my blog in the last month and a half and I was noticeably absent from social media for even longer. There’s not a succinct way to explain why other than to say that I’ve been going through this “thing.”
What the thing is, I can’t really tell you, but it has affected just about every aspect of my life.
I’m Busy AF
It started last year around the holidays with my daily life. My son was sick for the first time ever and it really took a toll on us. We couldn’t spend Thanksgiving with the entire family like we wanted to because Marley was so ill that he had to be taken to the emergency room. He recovered (thank God) only to have the flu TWICE in the following months. He also recovered from that. In between all the illness we’ve been trying desperately to find a place that we’re happy with while I’ve juggled being a mom, the owner of two businesses and an assistant to my friend at his production company. That doesn’t count the church ministry/volunteer position I ended up stepping away from, the self-care I eventually abandoned and getting sleep, having a normal relationship and everything in between.
A sister was/is tired!
Being busy is one thing but when very few people around you understand it, that busyness can lead to a laundry list of other things you have to deal with. It annoyed me that people couldn’t get that regardless of how old my son is now (he’s only 10 months by the way) all of the things that come with caring for him are still new to me and will be for his entire life. I’m a first time mother. I know nothing, OK? Everything I experience with him will be my first experience with it. I don’t get how that’s difficult for people to understand.
My Blog was Stressing Me Out
I started hating my blog and I lost my inspiration, which explains my absence here. I avoided posting, checking emails (I have 740 unread emails) and posting to social media. Honestly I think it was because of all the sponsored content I was posting. I love a good collaboration but I didn’t start this blog to be stressed by it. It is my creative outlet because I do this for my real job. I’d gotten caught up in the blogging rat race when you try to do what others are doing to make yourself feel like you’re important. You have FOMO when you aren’t doing huge sponsored programs or if your feed isn’t perfect, etc. I’m over that. Seriously. It’s not fun and my blog has to be fun for me. It’s pretty much the only fun that I have all to myself, if that makes sense. I cannot lose that element of it.
I’m working on trying to find a balance between the fun and the business side of it because I don’t want to stop collaborating with my favorite brands…I just can’t do so much of it. Ya feel me?
Getting Back to Me
I had an opportunity to speak on a panel about blogging to grow your business last week and it may have been the inspiration that I needed to get back to my normal self. I had so much fun talking about how I’ve been able to earn income from my blog and use it as a tool to further my personal and professional goals. I’ve been thinking a lot about what it would take to make this blog fun again while still giving my audience (you) what you like. I realized that all the things that I genuinely enjoy writing about are the things that you guys enjoy reading the most. With that said, I’ll be doing more original content in the coming weeks. I’ll get back to creating content around pop culture and other hot topics along with a sprinkle of my life here or there. You can always send me your suggestions by email or commenting below.
Thanks for staying on this wild ride with me. It has so many twists, turns and bumps but you manage to hang on. I appreciate it so much!