Do you have vivid dreams? I do. Sometimes they’re when I’m wide awake but most of the time they’re throughout the night while I’m sound asleep. For as long as I can remember, I’ve looked to my dreams for insight about the future.
Snakes in my dream? I’d better look out for someone being shady toward me or trying to sabotage me in some way. Dreaming about pregnancy again? Here comes a new beginning! More often that not, my dreams foreshadow what’s to come in my life. The easiest way I can tell whether or not I’m supposed to analyze a particular dream is by how much of it I remember and if I noticed a theme within it.
I’m a firm believer that God will speak to us whenever He’s sure we’re listening. Ironically, I listen most attentively when I’m asleep.
A few weeks ago I had one of the most intense dreams that I’ve had in a while. (Clearly it was intense if I can remember it so vividly after so much time has passed.) I was with my boyfriend and we were in an unfamiliar building that resembled part museum or some sort of historical venue and part hotel. We were walking hand in hand down a dimly lit hallway with orangish-brown walls and we came to a room on our right that contained two elevators.
The elevator to our right was operating as normal with several people entering and exiting as the elevator moved from floor to floor. We were standing directly in front of the remaining elevator and we were the only people waiting for it. Tony was slightly behind me so that I could enter the elevator first but when the doors slid open, I became afraid.
The elevator did not look safe at all. It was raggedy, the lights flickered and I had a feeling that as soon as we stepped on it, the entire thing would surely fall down at lightning speed. I told Tony that there was no way I was getting on it. He replied by telling me that we had to go up and this was the only way we could do it. I disagreed. I explained to him that I wanted to go up but I was afraid of the raggedy elevator and would rather take the stairs, regardless of how high I’d have to climb.
*I could shout right here…but I’ll wait!*
So we left the room, went down the hall and looked for the stairs. When we found them my heart skipped a beat. They looked even more unsafe than the elevator did! There were boards missing and the railing didn’t look like it would hold up. I told Tony there was no way I was taking those stairs and I decided to walk back to the elevators. He walked beside me and I woke up.
Before you read any further, I have to tell you that it took me a few days and a conversation with my friend, Roderick, before I figured out the meaning of this dream. Sometimes it’s good to talk to other believers and people who understand you on a spiritual level because they can really pull out gems that you may have missed.
Since coming to my interpretation of it, the Lord has moved so much in my life and in my relationship.
When I had this dream, it was during a long stretch of tension between me and Tony. I’ve written about how babies can change relationships and really test you. Although our son is almost eight months, we’re still adjusting. Not only that, sometimes I get on this high horse and I can be really mean to him and say hurtful things. I also have to add that he and I both are working towards goals we set individually before we even met and goals that we’ve established together. When we do a bad job of communicating our schedules can get crazy, causing stress. In short, we have a lot going on and it gets rough at times.
When we get upset we throw out the possibility of breaking up, even though it’s the last thing either of us wants to happen. Despite how well we work as a team, I have moments of arrogance and begin to feel like I don’t need him.
My elevator dream revealed two huge things to me.
First, God is trying to take me higher. He’s trying to elevate me…been trying to elevate me…but I procrastinate on my genius ideas and I underestimate my business acumen by letting small things cause fear and insecurity about what I’m doing. I’ve come a very long way in my career, I work with so many brands and amazing people – I couldn’t have even imagined it would be this way in just five years. At the same time, there’s levels to this and God is trying to get me to the next one but I’m trying to play it safe. Playing it safe isn’t how I’m supposed to do this. I have to go for it and be all the way in, totally trusting God.
Secondly, I can’t do this alone. Tony was right beside me the entire way, holding my hand and assuring me that I could do it. He was patient when I was afraid and he was encouraging when I tried to turn around – exactly how he is toward me in real life. He’s meant to be by my side and I’m meant to be by his as God takes us to new levels individually and as a couple. All I have to say about that is that God is good…and we have a huge announcement coming in a couple of weeks (no I’m not pregnant again) that neither of us saw coming or could have predicted.
I’m still nervous about stepping onto the elevator but with my teammate and best friend by my side and God guiding the journey, I can face my fears of my dreams and aspirations unfolding in ways I could not have made happen on my own.