All Posts By

Whitney Everett

Inspiration

Whit’s Wisdom: Unlearn The Conditioning We’ve Grown Used To

I wanted to go to cosmetology school but I was “smart” so I applied to colleges instead.

I was accepted to every college I applied to and ultimately I chose Jackson State University. I had a great learning and life experience there. After graduating, I went for my master’s degree. Why? Because I’m a scholar and scholars have licenses and degree abbreviations behind their names. It’s expected of me since I’m so “smart.”

I complete my master’s program at the University of Southern Mississippi and there I was…still unfulfilled. I then enter the workforce of working for the missions of others…at this point, I’m very unfulfilled.

I land this job that had decent pay and ranking. I made it to the management position with hard work, no vacations, late nights, hostile environments and dictators for superiors. Totally unfulfilled.

Finally it clicked… I’m an artist, I’m a creative being…I write…I design…I plan…I manage…I promote.

So I quit.

I quit faking it and I decided to be who God created me to be, a boss.

I realized what we’re told about college is not the whole truth. Sure, college is great, but we have been conditioned to go to school and get a job and work for someone else. Not to go to school to become versatile, well rounded, or creative and work for ourselves.

True enough everyone isn’t equipped nor does everyone have the desire to be a business owner, but we should know that option is attainable.

Now I realize my educational background is a plus to becoming a business owner. I also realize that my ability to sacrifice for the jobs I wasn’t passionate about was a testament to how passionate I would be in following my dreams. I now know that my hopes of becoming a hair stylist isn’t beneath me but beyond my wildest dreams. And because I’m “smart,” I will succeed.

Don’t be afraid to take risks. Unlearn the conditioning we have been accustomed to. Your ability is limitless.

Keep pressing and go for it!

Inspiration, Lifestyle

Whit’s Wisdom: When Someone Shows You Who They Are

This guy was visiting me at my home. We’d been conversing for a while and we were having a pretty good time hanging out. Things took quite a turn though. When he was leaving, he saw a car pulling up at my apartment complex and refused to leave until the person was gone.

I was stunned.

Of course, I analyzed his actions. Was it just because he is a private person and didn’t want people in his business? Or was it because he was hiding something?

Turns out it was the latter.

I said that to say, as and when a person shows you who they are, believe them. In my eyes he’s shown me that I can’t trust him so why should I invest my time and energy into pursing anything more? As I always say, actions speak louder than words.

Not only can I apply this to personal relationships, but also to jobs and other facets of life. I’ve held a couple of high positions where the higher-ups and supervisors were self-seeking, manipulative and controlling and those positions landed me in a place of darkness. But once I started believing them for who they were, the light began to shine. I was able to to respond better because I knew the intentions of who I was dealing with.

Don’t ever disregard a persons actions and consider “giving them the benefit of the doubt.” That is your enlightenment. That’s your weapon. I’m not saying don’t forgive, I’m saying be on guard. Everything and everyone is not for you!

Keep pressing and believe.

Sex, Love & Relationships

Whit’s Wisdom: He’s Just Not That Into You

Image credit: He's Just Not That Into You (2009)

Image credit: He’s Just Not That Into You (2009)

Are you in that grey area as and when you don’t know where you stand with a guy?

It happens to the best of us ladies and sometimes the truth is, he’s just not that into you.

I know it can be disheartening, but try not to let it reflect who you are. Don’t make it an issue about yourself. It’s okay that someone isn’t into you and it does not lessen your value or your bad word, just move on!

Thank God for growth because nowadays I can usually discern when a guy is into me and when he’s not. It doesn’t take long, you just have recognize the signs.

7 Ways You Can Tell That It’s Time to Move On:

1. Lack of Communication
He doesn’t call or text or he doesn’t call or text back in a decent time frame. Any man that wants you, wants to communicate with you. Even if it’s as simple as seeing how your day went. (Note: If you’re initiating most of the calls and texts it’s also time to move on because that’s not cool either.)

2. No Plans or Dates
He hasn’t asked you out or doesn’t involve you in his plans. That’s simple enough. Anyone that wants you is gonna want to be in your presence at some point and I’m not talking about the “let’s chill” visits at your house or at his. At some point you want to get out of the house, right?

3. Avoidance
When you call, he hurries off the phone. When you text it’s dry. It’s called avoidance. Why even bother any further? Refer back to #1.

4. Excuse
“My dog was sick, so I couldn’t answer my phone”. Ridiculousness at it’s best. Come on ladies.

5. bad word is the #1 Topic
You randomly text and say, “wyd,” and his response is “thinking about you joining me in the shower.” If that’s the basis of your conversation then that’s the basis of your relationship or that’s what he’s trying to make it. If that’s not what you want, cut it off! Otherwise, are you joining him in the shower or nah?

6. The Announcement
Guys will usually announce what they want in the beginning (especially if you inquire) by saying “I’m not looking for a relationship” or “I just want a friend.” Listen to that and don’t try to change it because you can’t! It’s up to you if you want to embark on that journey.

7. He Means What He Says
Guys aren’t THAT deep. I mean I know some deep guys but usually you can take what they say for face value. Refer back to #6. They usually mean what they say. No need to read beyond that.

My advice overall is for you to pray for discernment. Trust your

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, listen to the signs and act accordingly. You’ll be saving yourself a lot of time, energy and disappointment.

Culture

Whit’s Wisdom: We Will Continue To Rise Up

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I mean it’s 2014. Why are we still here?

What are you afraid of?

Is it our African descent?

Is it because you know the truth of our capabilities?

Are you afraid to admit you wouldn’t be where you are if it wasn’t for us?

Are we intimidating?

Do we scare you?

Is it the way we talk or dress?

Is it our pride?

Is it our joy?

Are you jealous?

Do you feel threatened by us?

Is it our resilience that confuses you?

Are we becoming too smart?

Too educated?

Well guess what. We will continue. It’s only the beginning. We won’t go away. We will continue to overcome. We will continue to rise up.

One day those that have been last will be first. Keep killing us. We are being reborn. Keep locking us up. We will attain freedom. We have attained freedom. Keep trying to hold us down. We will continue to rise up.

We won’t retaliate. We will elevate. We will love. We will have joy. You can’t take it away. Do you know why? It’s because you didn’t give it to us. Your tactics are getting old. We are fed up. You have only added fuel to our fire to overcome. We will continue to rise up.

In your many attempts to destroy us, our testimony in the end will be unity. We will continue to rise up.

Rest in love to the many Mike Browns, Trayvon Martins, Sean Bells, And Emmett Tills.

We will never forget.

Sex, Love & Relationships

Whit’s Wisdom: The Thirst is Real

thirsty-guyIt’s hard dating sometimes these days.

It seems like efforts are unmatched and the art of pursuit has been defiled by labels like thirsty. Silly me for thinking pursuit and courtship were good things.

The saying “the thirst” or “the thirst is real” usually means that a person’s desire is fueled by desperation. When you’re desperate for someone or something, you would do anything to get it.

Is thirst a bad thing? I think it can be as and when it’s desperate but pursuit and going after what you want, from a genuine place, is a great thing.

People have made pursuit seem like a bad thing, especially in the art of dating and I believe that it comes from not being able to get over rejection. We live in a society where self esteem is at an all time low. Whether you’ve been rejected by a job or by someone, it doesn’t define who you are or your potential. I believe that what God has for you, it is meticulously for you. Every detail. So don’t be afraid to try!

So I’d say that the thirst is real for me. I’ve always gone after what I want. Why stop now? It’s never been from desperation, only from the confidence I have within, knowing my value and not compromising myself or my values.

Whatever it is that you desire, go after it. Whomever you desire, go after them. You won’t know unless you try and if it’s not successful, well at least you know!

You’ll only know the measure of your thirst by how much you visualize the quench of it.

Keep pressing and satisfy your thirst.