How many times have you randomly logged into Facebook and scrolled your news feed all for it to tell you that another one of your friends is engaged? I know I personally feel salty sometimes because it makes me feel like I’m behind and am getting old! (I would never tell THEM this information though). Even so, I’m still happy for my friends and wish them all the best.
This situation begs to ask the question: Why do we compare ourselves to our peers based on what they post to social network sites?
These bittersweet feelings aren’t uncommon. Social psychologist Leon Festinger coined the social comparison theory in 1954 to explain these feelings. According to this theory, we see how we measure up to our peers in areas such as attractiveness, worth, success and more. It becomes a repetitive self-evaluation that could be detrimental to someone’s overall outlook on his or herself. Comparing yourself to others can make you doubt your self-worth and can lead to unhappiness because you don’t have what the next person has.
You really have to just sit back and realize that everyone is unique in their own way (as cliché as it sounds) and that life is full of choices. What happens to us in life is based off those choices as well as having access to opportunities. Some people may be afforded an opportunity that you weren’t, but that doesn’t mean you can’t obtain the same end goal another way. It’s really a mental process that you have to consciously be aware of. You can be your own worst critic so it’s dire to promote and encourage yourself since there’s no guarantee that someone else will for you. Be happy for your friend’s new job or car and know that you can acquire the same things if you put in the effort and network. The sky is the limit so smile and go out there and get it!
It’s time for a JessicaSimien.com open discussion!
For those of us faithful viewers of Love and Hip Hop NY, we’ve recently seen Peter Gunz’ love triangle with his longtime girlfriend, Tara, and his artist, Amina, slowly unfold.
If you haven’t been watching, here’s the scoop: Peter has two children with Tara and the couple has endured Peter’s infidelity in the past. Tara forgave him for the incident, but made it clear that she wouldn’t take him back if he cheated again. Unbeknownst to Tara, Peter married his artist, Amina, but he told her to be discreet about their marriage. Pause. He is doing the absolute most…on national television!
Now Peter did admit that the show is fake. In an interview, he revealed that he decided to expose his ain’t shit ways because of the paycheck, since he was going to get “busted anyway.” (Details here.)
Although Peter’s love triangle may be a little far-fetched for some, there are people that can actually relate to this drama.
People get hurt all the time by cheating. A person can say what they want as far as arguing for the legitimacy of why he/she cheated, but in the end, there really is no justification for it. If there is an issue, wouldn’t you want your significant other to tell YOU about it instead of resorting to cheating? After cheating, the pain and problems are still there. Therefore, nothing is solved, yet the person jeopardized a relationship that took time (among other things) to build for one night (or many nights) of passion. In Peter’s case, I can only imagine how his love triangle will turn out.
So, as and when is enough really enough?
In the words of Keri Hilson, every woman (or man) has a breaking point. Knowing when it is time to let the relationship go comes from reaching that breaking point. The thing is, everyone has different breaking points. What breaks you may not break the next person. Some people will stay with a cheater for months, even years! And some people will even take that cheater back, which brings us to our open discussion topic:
Would you take back a cheater?
Several people believe that once a person becomes a cheater, they’ll always be a cheater. Do you agree? Or can a person change? Let us know in the comment section and take our poll below!
Who doesn’t like chocolate?! (If you don’t, you should feel very special because you are indeed a rare breed!) Since it’s November, why not get ready for the holiday festivities with a DIY project? And we have an edible project that is sure to motivate you to get creative. This project is easy to do and can serve as place holders at the dinner table if you wish. Let’s get started!
For the ingredients, you will need double stuffed Oreo Cookies, candy corn, whoppers, peanut butter cups, chocolate frosting, and yellow Frosting. (Red frosting and black sprinkles are optional for the eyes).
It’s more convenient to use the pre-filled tubes of frosting to save you the hassle as well as mess to clean up after.
Step one: Grab a cookie. You don’t have to put frosting in there, but it may help you out in the long run because it holds in the candy corn a little better. Just give it a little squeeze of chocolate, then stuff in your candy corn. If you’re in some sort of candy corn shortage, you can cut off the white tips to use later for your beaks. The candy corn sticks in better with the tip so you can leave it on. Go ahead and do all of the cookies through this step.
For the next step, put a dab of frosting on the opposite end of the cookie and secure it to the “base” cookie. It helps to place them next to a wall as they dry so they stay put. While the cookies are drying, unwrap your PB cups. Take a sharp knife and cut a sliver off of one end. (Feel free to eat the unused pieces!) It helps to gently cut in a sawing motion so you don’t break the PB cup. Cut it from the bottom of the cup.
Once those are ready, flip your cookies over, but you may find it’s easy to keep them next to the wall. Place a dab of frosting on the PB cup, and place it on the cookie, face down.
Now those little guys will need heads, so glue a whopper on there with frosting as well. Put frosting on the side of the whopper that hits both the cookie and the PB cup. Wouldn’t want a turkey running around with its head cut off, would we?
While they’re still laying there, use a dab of frosting (preferably yellow) and glue on the white tip of a candy corn for a beak. Put two yellow dots on for eyes, and for the black spots in the eyes you can use a dab of chocolate frosting, or a mini chocolate chip, or a little sprinkle. A sprinkle is really the perfect size if you have them.
Once the beak stays put, you can flip them over and draw on some little yellow feet. If you have red frosting too (usually comes in a set with the tube of yellow) you can add a little gobble gobble. Or whatever that thing is called. What is it called anyway?!
Finally, you’re done! After those steps, I wouldn’t blame you if you stood back and admired your work before going in to take a few for yourself. No judgment here because I know I would! These will be perfect if you have kids because you can do this with them. If there are no kids, this can just satisfy your inner kid that loves anything sweet with chocolate!
Halloween can be tons of fun. Just think of all the free candy you get while dressing as someone scary or even as your favorite celebrity! However, the night can also be full of mischief and safety hazards. Here are some tips to ensure that you have a good, yet safe time for Halloween.
1. Swords, knives, and similar costume accessories should be short, soft, and flexible.
2. Avoid trick-or-treating alone. Walk in groups or with a trusted adult.
3. Fasten reflective tape to costumes and bags to help drivers see you.
4. Examine all treats for choking hazards and tampering before eating them. Limit the amount of treats you eat.
5. Hold a flashlight while trick-or-treating to help you see and others see you. Always WALK and don’t run from house to house.
6. Always test make-up in a small area first. Remove it before bedtime to prevent possible skin and eye irritation.
7. Look both ways before crossing the street. Use established crosswalks wherever possible.
8. Lower your risk for serious eye injury by not wearing decorative contact lenses.
9. Only walk on sidewalks whenever possible, or on the far edge of the road facing traffic to stay safe.
10. Wear well-fitting masks, costumes, and shoes to avoid blocked vision, trips, and falls.
11. Eat only factory-wrapped treats. Avoid eating homemade treats made by strangers.
12. Enter homes only if you’re with a trusted adult. Only visit well-lit houses. Don’t stop at dark houses. Never accept rides from strangers.
13. Never walk near lit candles or luminaries. Be sure to wear flame-resistant costumes.
Now that you’re aware of these safety tips, it’s time to go out and enjoy the night’s festivities!
Jackson photographer Sidney Conley has a desire to show Mississippi the beauty of art through his eyes. He started his artistic journey at Tougaloo College and went on to establish his own business, Sidney Conley Photography.
Check out our one-on-one with him below.
JESSICASIMIEN.COM: What part of Mississippi are you from? Sidney Conley: I was born and raised in Jackson.
JESSICASIMIEN.COM: How old are you? SC: I’m 25.
JESSICASIMIEN.COM:What’s your educational background? SC: I graduated from Murrah High School in 2006 and I graduated from Tougaloo College with a Bachelor’s in Art last May.
JESSICASIMIEN.COM:As far as your industry, how did you get your start in the business? SC: I basically took every Art course that was offered at Tougaloo and the only course I didn’t take was photography…so I was just going at it because I didn’t have a choice and I fell in love with it. After I graduated from Tougaloo, I bought my own camera and started taking pictures and just doing what I love…just creating art and people started seeing it and I just kept going and I don’t really consider it a movement or a hustle. I’m just a simple guy that likes taking pictures of art and sharing it with the world.
JESSICASIMIEN.COM:What’s your take on success in Mississippi in the photography business? SC: I don’t think this area really has been exposed to art so I think that’s my job to open up this area’s eyes to what’s really art and what I consider art to be. I just want to show everyone art through my eyes.
JESSICASIMIEN.COM:What does being a Mississippian mean to you? SC: It means a lot! Just growing up being limited to resources has taught me how to take advantage of what I have and to fully use it because we really don’t have like a lot of places to shoot that’s really nice so I take the smallest things and just turn it into magic.
JESSICASIMIEN.COM:Who are your artistic influences? SC: Michelangelo, Leonardo Da Vinci and Van Gogh.
JESSICASIMIEN.COM:Why those three? SC: Because I researched them. I started off as a painter and then I moved on to drawing. The Sistine Chapel was painted by Michelangelo and I loved it and one day I hope to go see it and Van Gogh’s painting structures and styles just inspired me to create art and now that I know the history of art, it’s easy for me to take a picture and make sure every picture is filled with art.
JESSICASIMIEN.COM:What has been your favorite session and why? SC: My favorite series is the Runaway Bride because honestly I was just brainstorming one day and the idea just came to my head out the blue and I wanted to do a bride shoot, but I didn’t want it to be all happy and what not. I just wanted something different so that’s as and when the concept came for the Runaway Bride. I didn’t want her to just be the typical running down the street or somewhere. I got to thinking of what someone might do and that’s how I created the picture of her walking in the water and then the other concept was the changes of a runaway bride running into the woods so it’s another concept that I thought of and if people would go look at my work, they would see that it kind of has like a mist behind her and she’s leaving two luggage cases and I just put a lot of time and work in that and I’m proud of that series.
JESSICASIMIEN.COM:What do you feel sets you apart from other photographers? SC: I don’t really…hmmm, I’m not gonna sit here and say that I don’t watch other photographers because I do and that’s a key concept that I taught myself – to learn from their mistakes. I don’t really know what sets me apart. I just know that I like to have all the elements of art in one picture and if that’s what sets me apart, then I guess that’s what it is, but I don’t really study their work. I just know what my work has to include.
JESSICASIMIEN.COM:Any advice for emerging photographers? SC: To do what you love and don’t mold your work to any other photographer. I started out doing what I love and that’s exactly how I wanna end.
JESSICASIMIEN.COM:What does photography do for you personally? SC: Man, it just brings peace to me. If anyone has ever seen me at a shoot, I’m always laughing because I love doing it. I wanna do this for the rest of my life and it just brings me joy when I can please the client. If I was rich, I would do this for free because this is what I wanna do and I don’t mind doing it. I would say it brings me peace.
JESSICASIMIEN.COM:When did you actually start your business. SC: Really, honestly, I don’t even look at myself as a business just yet. Others do and it may look like a business, but me personally, I look at it as a young person who likes taking pictures and people just like seeing them. So, that’s how I look at it. I don’t really look at it as a business, but to answer your question, it started last year when I brought my camera. I was brainstorming and asking myself for a long time, “What should I call myself? What should I call my work?” And I was just like, “Hey, what’s more simple than my name?”
JESSICASIMIEN.COM:Any last thoughts on the photography business or working in Mississippi? SC: Basically I just want to do something that no one has ever done before. I want to show Mississippi and represent Mississippi the best way I know how. When people look at my work, I want their mouths to drop and be like, “Wow, that’s crazy.” And that’s really all I strive for.
To connect with Sidney and to view his work, follow him on Instagram @sidney_conley.
This interview was a part of our annual Mississippi Month feature. Like what you read? Share it using the hashtag #JSMississippiMonth!